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From Broadcasting to Boardroom

That title isn’t completely accurate since I’m technically still in the broadcasting industry, but it kind of describes the shift I’ve felt over the past year. I was reading about how women typically don’t make as much as men (no shocker there, really), and the author was contending sometimes women don’t put up a fight for that extra three or five grand because they think - that much money isn’t that big a deal, it’s not worth the hassle.  But in ten years, that can be the difference between an extra few years of work (I’m not being totally accurate, but that was the basic point).  I am TOTALLY guilty of thinking that way - so this article got me thinking about how I ended up there - it has a lot to do with the mentality that was cultivated through some of my past jobs.

I started out in small market news.  I was making less than 20 grand. I went to work for a station I’d interned at throughout college, and I figured (this is how they get ya!), some money was better than an unpaid internship, even if my hourly pay worked out to about minimum wage.  Plus I was doing what I loved, which made it a lot easier to swallow.  Then I accepted a similar job at a similar station, making a little more, and I was thrilled.  Again, I didn’t negotiate a salary, since I was happy to get over that 20-grand hump.  Of course, after working 12 hour days and overnights, doing two - sometimes three - people’s work, all for little or no reward, I began to think asking for more wasn’t such a bad idea.

At this point also, you have to understand, the money in TV is shit.  Unless you’re at a network level as an anchor, you’re scraping by.  On the lower levels, it really doesn’t matter if you’re a guy or girl, on-air or behind the scenes, 19 grand is 19 grand is 19 grand.  I felt gypped but hey, we ALL felt gypped. Plus, we were “doing what we loved,” so we all took it. If we didn’t, there were 20 thousand recent college grads that would. That’s the mentality I had.

It was also the same mentality that led me to believe (and rightfully so) that I could do the best at the job I was in, but that was pretty much it.  In that type of TV news, moving up in markets is pretty much all you have, unless you want to make the jump to news director - but I never did.  I had almost NO business mind-set (except for the little tidbits Ryan tried to teach me).  Sure, news is a business. DEFINITELY.  But all the business-type stuff takes place in corporate offices at the companies that own the affiliates, or at the network itself, if you’re owned by them.  At the very least, it goes on the in the sales offices of the affiliates - where the news people never venture.  I thought I’d produce news forever - hopefully in a bigger market, maybe at a talk show, maybe as an executive producer.  I ADORED my career, but for what I wanted to do, there really wasn’t a corporate ladder to climb.

Then I moved to the big city. After freelancing at the big networks, proving to myself that I could hack it, making more than twice what my pay had been before, then realizing I didn’t want to go into work at midnight or 3 am for the rest of my life, I ditched network news for a hip, green, cable company start up.

There are things I miss about network news, but I’ve never looked back. I’m still in the TV biz, and working at a relatively new start-up (albeit, with an already-huge staff, and amazing funding and sales) is at once exhausting and rewarding, frustrating and perfect.  I’ve been here for almost 8 months, and that initial new-job “glow” has worn off a little, but never been completely tarnished.

Anyway, working at an actual “business” - with presidents, SVPs, directors and coordinators - that’s still trying to find its feet, presents amazing opportunities.  I’m not pegged in to one job, and it took me a while to realize that.  As our company grows, I can assume more responsibility.  I can pitch creative ideas that actually get accepted and encouraged.  I can dream as big as I want to, and as long as I back it up with a proposal, someone will at least give the pitch more than just a cursory glance.  I have bosses I love (shocking!), who I strive to learn from and emulate (even more shocking!).  I’ve started looking at this as more than just a job, and realize the opportunity I have to move up and on to things I didn’t even know I could or wanted to be.

So, to bring this back to getting paid … when I got this job, I did just accept what was offered me, while also telling my boss what I’d like to be making in the near future - which was a big step for me.  I guess, even though I’ve always been a career girl, now I’m taking more initiative with that career.  I’m becoming more of a business girl.  I meet with my boss to discuss my ideas and goals.  I write proposals (a year ago, I didn’t even know what a proposal was…).  I’m increasing my value, so when the time comes that I ask for more money (something I still hate to do); I’ll actually get it.

i hesitated writing this for a couple reasons. for one, i guess it’ll show i’m a little sentimental and not 100% cynical, and i’m not completely ok with showing that (small) side of me. it took hundreds of hours and thousands of dollars spent on therapy for me to even admit i *have* that side. also, i’m going to quote song lyrics, and i’m not a 14 year old highschool girl. plus those lyrics are by the dixie chicks. but what the hell, i am what i am.

i’ve listened to this song more than i care to admit because it really strikes something within me. oddly, several of the songs on the dixie chicks’ new album have had that affect on me, but i’ll save those for later.

this particular one made me think of my relationship with ryan:

Busses, cars, and airplanes leaving
Burning fumes of gasoline
And everyone is running
And I come to find a refuge in the

Easy silence that you make for me
It’s okay when there’s nothing more to say to me
And the peaceful quiet you create for me
And the way you keep the world at bay for me
The way you keep the world at bay

i kind of pride myself on being the a-typical girl, and in some ways i think i am. “feelings” make me uncomfortable, i hate valentine’s day and forced sentiment, i don’t like to cuddle, i need my own time - and for the most part ryan and i do our own thing during the week, and set aside specific time on the weekends to spend together. it’s taken us awhile to figure out what works for us - not what we WANT to work for us, but what REALLY works. and it’s an evolving work in process.

but on the flip-side, i’m kind of a walking girl-cliche. i want to be taken care of. for all my show of independence, career-oriented-mentality, and woman power, i still want someone i can fall back on. i thank my dad for that, since - although i’m married and in my 20’s - i still consider myself a daddy’s girl. he was always willing to go out of his way to make life a little easier for his girls - my mom included.

i probably sound crazy, spoiled, and naive. but in some ways, i’m ok with that. and that’s why the song brings me back to my sentimental side. ryan and i have an intense, and at times volitile, relationship. part of it is immaturity at times, and part of it is just who we are as people and as a couple. but he’s my haven because he always has my back. he understands that i’m i’m crazy, spoiled and naive. he knows that i’ll work a 12 hour day to get ahead (well, ok, because i have to), but still expect him to do our taxes and deal with the finances. i know he works hard - in part because he does enjoy it - to assure we can live the quality of life we want to live - now, AND in 20 years. and really, i don’t know the half of the time and effort he invests into investments, side projects, work and more. it’s part of how he keeps the world at bay for me. it’s hard for me to verbalize how i feel about that - which is why i’ll just let the dixie chicks do it for me.

i’m pretty sure that my family is the only family where these two words go together. i am not a camper. i am not outdoorsy. while i CAN do all of these things, i do not LIKE to hike, bike, ski, snowboard, camp, kayak, and other various assundry things that involve me being active outdoors. don’t get me wrong. i am active, and i like being outdoors. i work out five days a week, take dance classes on the weekend, i take yoga, and regularly see a trainer and a nutritionist. i am hell bent on being healthy and in shape. i also love the sun and scenerey (true, my prefered choice of scenery is a cityscape by a beach, not the mountains and forest) and can’t bare to spend a nice, sunny day indoors (as i’m doing now, spending a saturday at work).

the thing about my outdoor preferences is that i’d rather stroll through a farmers market along the waterfront (like i did this morning), hang out in a boat on calm waters, lay out at the beach with a magazine and plenty of tanning oil, or sit with a book at a sidewalk cafe. this is not for lack of trying on my father’s part. hell, growing up we had season ski passes. we’d spend weekends on the mountains. we had season tickets to the air force falcons football (while in colorado). we went on family bikerides. and we camped.

once a year, for a long time, we took summer camping trips. my sister and i DREADED this time of year. my mom was a better sport than we were, but she still was not thrilled. and my dad, as usual, was unnecessarily optimistic. come hell or high water (i remember driving through rainstorms, camping gear packed, with my dad insisting he “saw blue sky just ahead”) we made that trip. and we slept in tents. my mom had a few conditions - that my dad plan it all, that there be bathrooms. and there must be electric outlets at the site. for her cappuccino machine.

i’ve told this story dozens of times, and no one can ever believe that my camping trips growing up included gourmet coffee. i think this little nugget of my history is one of the best ways to give people a glimpse of why i am the way i am today. it also helps explain why now, when my parents still make a yearly trek to spend a few days in the mountains skiing, i may meet them there, and while ryan joins my dad on the slopes, my mom and i spend a leisurely day hanging out at the resort, shopping at the outlet malls, and drinking hot chocolate in the lodge.

things have been a little … crazy … at work lately. all the stress got me thinking that, while the long hours, drama and excess requirements are wearing on my last nerve - mentally, physically, emotionally - any one of these intese days is totally different from what i would consider my worst day at a job.

it happened at my last job, when i was producing a two hour morning show all by myself. All BY *MYSELF.* just me, my computer, the scanners, and some weird guys back in master control, from around midnight till 3 a.m., when the photogs, talent, and crew came in. anyway, this particular day was a culmination of several weeks of annoying phone calls from this guy that wanted to be on the show. i worked in a medium-sized market (obviously - what kind of larger market would force an entire two hour show on one producer?), so people rarely ever searched ME out, wanting to be on the show. i mean, it was no Good Morning America. i spent hours researching local activities, keeping on top of city even calendars, staying in touch with my “contacts,” having my sleep interrupted, to get good, interesting info and guests on my show. true, it WASN’T GMA, but why should that stop me from making in the best it could be?

so when this guy called me, i was initially intrigued. he WANTED to be on my show!! the more he talked, the more he started to be pushy, and REALLY annoying about trying to get on the show. i could only imagine what someone like that would be like when he was actually on TV. he was a singer from some old school band that had been popular in the 70’s. to get off the phone, i told him i’d think about it, and talk to my crew. of course i didn’t have to do that, and rarely did, since the talent pretty much trusted my judgement. basically, i’d already decided i didn’t want him on the show, and was trying to give him the brush-off - nicely.

a couple days later, he called again. this time i told him my decision - that i didn’t think it would work out. in all honesty, we WERE booked. although i didnt have people begging for time slots, because of my diligence, i usually managed to fill the show’s guest slots, almost fully, about three or four weeks out. so that’s what i told him. well, he wouldn’t take no for an answer. as he continued to (pathetically) joke, and try to sell himself, i became more convinced i’d made the right decision. after a few mintues i had to cut him off - i was a one-man-producing show, and i had work to do.

i wish i could say that was it, i was a little curt, and it was over. but this post is titled “the worst day ever,” so you know that’s not true. he KEPT calling, which is like the worst PR ever. if someone doesn’t want you on their show, the way to change their mind is NOT to call and badger them, especially when you already know they are completely SLAMMED from 10 pm till 3 am. he called a few times in the next week or so … and i just got sick of dealing with him b/c he had actually turned beligerent. so i told my boss the whole situation, he told me to pass the guy off on him, and i did.

i’m assuming my boss told him exactly what i had - this is our call, we’re booked, please don’t hassle us any more. case closed, i forgot about it.

then maybe a week later, i was in the booth, about 15 minutes from the end of my show when some random guy showed up. IN THE BOOTH. it was HIM. now, a TV station is usually totally locked down, so another issue was, how the hell did this guy even get in here?? an issue i resolved when i discovered who the offender was. but anyway, i now had mr. beligerent essentially in my office, uninvited. he gave me the whole schpiel about why he should go on, he was this historic music icon, he’d played w/michael jackson, etc, etc. all the while i’m TRYING to effing PRODUCE A SHOW. i have anchors talking to me in my headset, photogs asking questions, my Technical Director and crew are dont’ know what’s going on, plus, we’d just opened our phone lines for a contest and of course it was my job to answer them.

let me re-explain how NOT to convince a producer to let you on their show. do not call and be annoying. do not be rude. do not force them to turn you over to their bosses (who, by the way, if they’re good bosses and the producer is a good employee, will always side wiith the employee). and for fuck’s sake DO NOT violate what the boss told you, what the producer told you, and what the security system should have told you, and show up IN THE PRODUCER BOOTH. with 15 minutes left in the show. even if you were Jesus Himself, how in His name am i supposed to fit you in, when i now have ten minutes left??!!

so i argued with the guy (in between talking to the anchors, answering phones, giving weather cues, and so forth) for a few minutes and finally told him - i am doing a show here. this is rude. i don’t know how you got it, but you can go wait in the green room. then he had the nerve to argue with me, until he eventually gave in and hauled his annoying ass to the green room.

after the show, i went back to the newsroom and met up with my anchors and crew, and told them who had decided to come in anyway. (they knew the whole story up to this point, as they’d been getting daily updates since the beginning.) i was SO PISSED OFF, that my entire anchor team - who totally had my back - volunteered to go talk to him and at least ask him to leave until normal business hours, when our boss came in, since at this point it was only 7 a.m.

if i remember correctly, the guy left, and i called my boss, hysterically angry, explaining to him what had happened. he said he would come in right then. by the time my boss got in, crazy musician had returned to the green room (if he ever left), and my boss headed in to talk with him. i followed, of course, feeling the need to defend myself. i listened to the guy go on a tirade about how all the other stations in town had given him air time (probably b/c their producers weren’t as strong as i was!), how he was this great musician, had been in this band, performed with these people, and of course this young, underqualified producer wouldn’t put him on the air b/c she didn’t know who he was. she was uneducated and incompetent.

that’s where i lost it. i returned with a tirade of my own: not only is that not true, it has nothing to do with knowing who you are or not. you called me incessently, didn’t listen, then CAME INTO MY BOOTH. why would you expect me to put you on air when you would do something like that?

he started back in with the incompetent, uninformed, young producer bit again, and i walked away - leaving my boss to handle it. i stormed into the bathroom, and for the first and only time in my life while at work, bust into tears. How DARE someone act SO rudely, so unprofessionally, then question MY skills. the fact alone that i saw through him and refused to have him on the show proved to me that in that area, i WAS skilled. i didn’t regreat my decision one bit. it might have been easier to give in after the first couple phone calls, but i wasn’t just being stubborn because he was annoying, i was refusing to let him get away with tormenting me into giving him his way. anyone who would act like that didn’t deserve any air time.

my anchor came into the bathroom a few minutes later, and told me my boss was totally standing up for me, and not letting the Crazy Man get away with treating us that way. which made me happy, but not as happy as what one of the photogs told me a few days later. he said he’d been watching some of the other stations, and had seen Crazy McSinger on every other morning show. in a normal situation, i would have been panicking, if we were the only station to miss out on covering something and it happened on my watch. but in this case, i knew i’d done the right thing. plus, my photog told me Crazy had totally dominated the segments he’d been on, talking about himself, and not letting the anchors get a word in edgewise. in a weird way, i had my revenge. i’d held my show up to my personal standard i’d set for it, and i was really happy about it.